Helping Relationship GIRISH CHANDRA ANANTHANARAYANA 19TH . Ingredients of a Helping Relationship Egan () identifies the. giving them a feeling for the complexity inherent in any helping relationship. Gerard Egan, Ph.D., is Emeritus Professor of Psychology and Organizational. Within each of these stages, Egan describes a number of skills that are helping clients to identify what it is they want and need, in order to deal more Ending: the relationship between counsellor and client comes to an.
As well as being linked to counselling and guidance, helping is often used to talk about specific moments of teaching e. It is also associated with giving direct physical assistance — for example, helping someone to wash or to go to the toilet — or practical aid such as giving clothing or money. However, describing the role exclusively in terms of counselling or teaching or educating narrows things down too much for us. Making sense of what these people are actually doing and expressing entails drawing upon various traditions of thinking and acting.
This form of helping involves listening and exploring issues and problems with people; and teaching and giving advice; and providing direct assistance; and being seen as people of integrity. Smith and Smith Helpers are concerned with learningrelationship and working with people to act on their understandings. However, they also step over into the world of counselling.
They do this by being experienced as a particular kind of person and drawing upon certain skills, not by taking on the persona of counsellor British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy ; Higson Counselling entails a more formalized relationship than what we are talking about as helping; and is based in a specific set of traditions of thinking and practice.
Thus, the helping relationship in the context of therapy and counselling feels and looks different to the helping relationship in the context of pastoral care or housing support — but more of this later.
Helping relationships – principles, theory and practice
The helping person — caring, committed and wise To reword Parker Palmer This means that helpers both need to know themselves, and seek to live life as well as they can. They need to be authentic. In a passage which provides one of the most succinct and direct rationales for a concern with attending to, and knowing, our selves Parker Palmer draws out the implications of his argument.
As I teach, I project the condition of my soul onto my students, my subject, and our way of being together…. When I do not know myself, I cannot know who my students are. I will see them through a glass darkly, in the shadows of my unexamined life — and when I cannot see them clearly, I cannot teach them well.
When I do not know myself, I cannot know my subject — not at the deepest levels of embodied, personal meaning. I will know it only abstractly, from a distance, a congeries of concepts as far removed from the world as I am from personal truth. As well as knowing themselves, Smith and Smith argue that helpers also need certain other qualities. When people search for someone to help them reflect upon and improve their lives, they tend to be drawn into relationship with those who are seen or experienced as caring, committed and wise.
They are liable to look around for help from people whom they can approach easily and with confidence. Compassion is being in tune with oneself, the other person s and the whole world.
It is goodness at its most intuitive and unreflecting. It is a harmony which opens itself and permits the flowing out of love toward others without any reward. It avoids using people as tools. It sees them as complete and without a need to be changed.
David Brandon put caring and concern to alleviate suffering at the core of helping. Caring-for someone, according to Noddings, involves sympathy — feeling with.
It also entails being open to what the other person is saying and might be experiencing and reflecting upon it.
However, there is also something else here. When caring for another we have to be concerned with the interests of the that person. Carers have to respond to the cared-for in ways that are, hopefully, helpful. There must also be some realization on the part of the cared-for that an act of caring has occurred. Caring involves connection and relationship between the carer and the cared-for, and a degree of reciprocity.
Both gain from the relationship in different ways and both give see Smith Caring-about is more abstract.
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When we talk about caring-about it usually involves something more indirect than the giving immediate help to someone. For example, we may care-about the suffering of those in poor countries. In this we are concerned about their plight. This may lead to us wanting to do something about it — but the result is rarely care-for. Nel Noddings argues that we learn first what it means to be cared-for — particularly in families and close relationships. This caring-about, Noddings suggests, is almost certainly the foundation for our sense of justice.
Wisdom Smith and Smith It is quality which especially attracts people to them for help.
However, while they possess expertise: Rather it is how they are with us, and we with them. We can feel valued and animated and, in turn, value them. Out of this meeting comes insight. It generally means that the person so labelled is seen as having a deep understanding, a regard for truth, and an ability to come to sound judgements.Addiction and Relationships with Jerry Egan - Part 1
He suggested that a helping relationships could be defined as one in which: In other words, Carl Rogers understood that counselling relationships, for example, were just special instances of interpersonal relationships in general op.
Carl Rogers on the interpersonal relationship in the facilitation of learning What are these qualities, these attitudes, that facilitate learning? Realness in the facilitator of learning. Perhaps the most basic of these essential attitudes is realness or genuineness. This means that the feelings that she is experiencing are available to her, available to her awareness, that she is able to live these feelings, be them, and able to communicate if appropriate.
It means coming into a direct personal encounter with the learner, meeting her on a person-to-person basis. It means that she is being herself, not denying herself. There is another attitude that stands out in those who are successful in facilitating learning… I think of it as prizing the learner, prizing her feelings, her opinions, her person. It is a caring for the learner, but a non-possessive caring. It is an acceptance of this other individual as a separate person, having worth in her own right.
It is a basic trust — a belief that this other person is somehow fundamentally trustworthy… What we are describing is a prizing of the learner as an imperfect human being with many feelings, many potentialities.
A further element that establishes a climate for self-initiated experiential learning is emphatic understanding. This said the spirit and direction of what Rogers says, and the framework that these conditions offer, provides us with a good starting point and orientation to exploring and fostering helping relationships.
Does helping involve seeing people in deficit? David Brandon was very alive to this possibility in his exploration of helping relationships. Indeed, he looked at some of the different ways in which helpers can hinder the development and flourishing of those they seek to help. One common means is through focusing too strongly on institutional and bureaucratic ways of defining the situations and experiences of people.
The Skilled Helper: A Problem-management Approach to Helping - Gerard Egan - Google Книги
In order to access resources people often have to either define themselves, or be defined as, in deficit or needy.
A current UK example of this is how young people are deemed to be NEET not in employment, education or training so that the agency can get additional funding for the work and meet targets. The labelling and data-sharing involved can quickly work against the interests of the young people involved, invade their right to privacy, and inhibit the creation of the sorts of space and relationships they need to flourish. These concerns led him to be careful when talking of compassion, to distinguish between such caring and pity.
The latter, he believed inevitably embodied a tendency to superiority, to looking down on the other. David Ellerman has argued for five principles: Help must start from the present situation of the doers. Helpers must see the situation through the eyes of the doers. Help cannot be imposed on the doers, as that directly violates their autonomy.
For some, this is enough, for others it is just the beginning. What else is there about that? With the help of empathic reflections and challenges, the speaker uncovers blind spots or gaps in their perceptions and assessment of the situation, of others and of themselves - their patterns, the impact of their behaviour on the situation, their strengths. Challenging; different perspectives, patterns and connections, shoulds and oughts, negative self-talk, blind spots discrepancies, distortions, incomplete awareness, things implied, what's not saidownership, specifics, strengths.
Is there anything you've overlooked? What about all of this is a problem for you? Any other way of looking at it? In this stage, the helper seeks to move the speaker from stuckness to hope by helping Them choose an area that they have the energy to move forward on, that would make a difference and benefit them.
Facilitating focussing and prioritising an area to work on. What in all of this is the most important? What would be best to work on now? What would make the most difference? Stage 1 can be 5 minutes or 5 years; it may be all someone needs. Stage 2 - What do I want instead? People often move from problem to action, or problem to solution, without reflecting on what they really want, or in what way their problems might be opportunities.
Stage 2 is about this, about helping the speaker to open up a picture of what they really want, and how things could be better. This stage is very important in generating energy and hope. For some people this is scary, for some liberating. Brainstorming, facilitating imaginative thinking, i.
Quality Anything goes - have fun Write down ideas verbatim, don't analyse or judge Keep prompting - 'what else? What do you ideally want instead? What would be happening? What would you have that you don't have now? Goals which are demanding yet achievable are motivating. What exactly is your goal? How would you know when you've got there? Which feels best for you? Out of all that, what would be realistic? When do you want to achieve it by? Is it worth it?