A Therapist Shares 8 Things To Look For In A Life Partner. - Evergreen Counseling
Figuring out what you want in a partner can be trickier than you think. Sure Some people rely on their relationship for a partner in crime, some. Most of us have long list of things we're searching for in a mate. But what should we really be looking for to ensure relationship success?. If you've ever wanted to pick a therapists' brain about what you might want to look for in a life partner, keep reading to find out more. The reality is this: long-term romantic relationship can be HARD. It is also beautiful.
Seeking perfection is an idle search. Instead, what you should look for in a partner is emotional maturity. This means someone who is willing to think and learn about themselves, who is open to reflecting on the past and evolving in the present. This certain someone should be non-reactive, in the sense that they think before they act. Openness Along with emotional maturity, one of the things to look for in a partner is an openness to feedback.
Not only should your partner be interested in changing his or her own self-limiting behaviors, but he or she should be open to hearing what you have to say. Open and honest communication is vital to sustaining a close relationship.
When a couple is willing to openly communicate about themselves and their feelings and reactions to each other, they avoid building a case and creating tensions that later tear them apart.
By being resilient and hearing each other out, they construct a solid foundation for a workable relationship that is sure to evolve over time. Honesty While deception is generally frowned upon, lying is sadly common in many relationships.
17 important qualities to look for in your life partner
Some couples believe they need lies to survive, yet research shows that lying less is linked to better relationships. Being able to trust is so important when choosing a life partner. Look for someone whose actions meet their words and someone who is open about how they feel.
Someone who hides aspects of themselves can leave you feeling insecure and mistrusting.
Respectful and Sensitive One of the most valuable qualities to look for in a partner is respect. When you find someone who encourages you to be yourself, you can feel secure in your relationship, yet independent within yourself.
This attuned way of relating is both sensitive and respectful of who you are as an individual, separate from your partner. When someone appreciates you and takes an interest in the things you are passionate about, you can really share life with this person, while continuing to pursue your unique interests. Independent People often make the mistake of thinking that a relationship is a way for two people to become one.
Attempting to merge your identity with someone else is not only bad for you, but bad for the relationship.
When couples fall into routine and forego their independent attraction to each other, things tend to go south. By maintaining your individuality: All of this will fade and change and ebb over the course of time. Look for someone who is growth and learning-oriented. The reality is this: It is also beautiful, inspiring, hilarious and many other wonderful things.
10 Things To Always Look For In A Relationship
But make no mistake; it can be hard, too. Getting two humans to stay together with all their quirks, preferences, and baggage day-in and day-out, year after year as you grow, evolve, and possibly change as individuals takes work and it takes a willingness to grow and to learn. A partner who is only available to see the happy, shiny stuff of life and who wants to quit the relationship when the tough stuff hits may not be long-term life partner material as life is chock-a-block full of the not-so-shiny stuff.
Find someone you can be yourself around and who you can count on to be there when the tough stuff of life gets dished out. Choose someone with mostly similar values and a similar life vision as you.
Sharing similar goals and a similar life vision is. Differences in values and life vision can be worked throughof course, but you set yourself and your relationship up for success when you choose a life partner who, at the very least, shares some or most of your key values and goals.
What to Look For in a Partner
Choose someone who is a good forgiver. So choose a life partner who is a good forgiver. Who can accept your apologies after you mess up. Who can move past arguments with you. Who can forgive you for not being your kindest self sometimes. Because messing up in a relationship is inevitable. Choose someone who is a good friend. If this person were not your lover, would you want them to be your friend?
Do you admire and respect how this person shows up in their other friendships? Sex and romance is a slice of the pie of relationship.