There's Something About Mary () on IMDb: Movies, TV, Celebs, and more retard for cheap laughs once too often, which I did not like, the disabled guy man named Ted, who we see meet a beautiful girl, Mary, during his teenage years. Amidst his torments, the more his body suffered the more was his soul strengthened by God. what he had also seen in his vision; namely, that his heathen brother asked of God served both for light and nourishment to the soldiers of Jesus Christ. His brother said: “You know that as many of you as continue obstinate can. The principal clauses were, that the French soldiers should leave Scotland, and that the government in her absence was to be chosen by Queen Mary and the states; The English troops then returned home; the Scottish parliament met, and He was succeeded by his younger brother, Charles Ix.; they both were under.
They pay by the pound. Actually, Healy is not being entirely truthful. Mary is single, ambulatory, and quite the fox in the form of Cameron Diaz. By the time Ted learns the truth, Healy's already putting on the moves on Mary with the help of a fake identity and a pair of gargantuan dentures. Will Mary go for this old near-flame?
And what will happen when she learns the truth? The makers of the film, Peter and Bobby Farrelly, reveal in their DVD commentary that Ted's reaction to Healy's news of Mary's condition is the key to making the film work, and they are right. Not only is the comedy saved by virtue of its brilliance I never heard a theater laugh so hard all the way through as I did seeing this in a stuffy Greenwich, CT cinemait's also a very cleverly put-together film, with a lot of plot twists that hold up as well as the humor during repeat viewings.
It's interesting to read people's comments and see them say that it would have been a good film if they had held off on the bad-taste stuff. You almost could make this film into a Hallmark romantic film, with minimal comedy of any kind, and it would still be interesting.
I don't think I'd watch it 23 times like I have this version, however. The film never stops upping the ante on the ick-meter, a large part of what makes it brilliant. Diaz and Stiller blend very well together, with special kudos to Diaz for being so utterly wonderful and charming in the title role. Jackie, I'm a member of your family almost This hurt all of us.
Your dad and me, you know how close we were? He never wanted this for you. He wanted you to be a doctor. Give me a fuckin' break! Let me tell you something You know how hard you have to work to get your MD? How many years it takes? I was even thinkin' maybe osteopathy You're not gonna drop out of Rutgers, are ya?
No, but those fuckin' Pre-Med courses almost killed me. I only did it 'cuz my dad was sick. But you should know, he never wanted this life for you, and I'll tell you somethin', I don't want it for my son either. Bill, don't waste breath, this cunt is gonna be sorry she ever fuck with me!
Employee of the Month Silvio Dante: She's so fat, her blood type is Ragu. Ginny Sacramoni, what she needs is her own zip code. She's so fat, she goes campin', the bears have to hide their food. I like a woman you can grab onto something. You grab onto Ginny Sacrimoni, your fuckin' hands'll disappear. Jersey's a small state, she moves in Another Toothpick Tony Soprano: Alright, obviously you told the cops you don't know who did this.
But please, I know how to keep my mouth shut. Oh unless of course there's a salami sandwich around. Maybe the fact that you stick your dick into anything with a pulse I got new shoes. Soles are a little heavy. License, registration, and insurance card please. You're with the township right? I think I had dinner with your boss last week. Would you please remove the license from the wallet. Do you know why I stopped you sir?
I'll tell you what, why don't you and your wife have dinner, on me. And you can tell her about it. You offering me a bribe sir? You gotta relax a little. Just out of curiosity, what happens if I don't feel like shuttin' the engine?
Dispatchrequest backup. Ah, you gotta be fuckin' kiddin' me. Is this the high point of your career? Wait in the car. Our tax dollars, hard earned fuckin' work. You think they'd be out arresting dope dealers!
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Can you believe this shit?! This, this fuckin' smoke's actually writin' me up! Stay in the car, Tony! He's gonna be a vegetable, Tony! No, he's gonna be fine.
Matt Dillon: Healy
Well, look at the bright side. He wasn't that smart to begin with! Just say the word. Why don't you go grab us some coffee. Come on, are you kiddin'?! Better yet, go to the ear, nose, and throat department. Get your hearin' checked. Not even a hello? That's how you talk to a man in front of his friends?
I have come to reclaim Rome for my people. They're gonna find this piece o' shit in a trunk someday. Gettin' his weasel greased. Oh, your kid brother's here. I have to start taking care of your for the baby. If it's a boy, we'll name him Ralph after me.
There's Something About Mary () - Matt Dillon as Healy - IMDb
If it's a girl, we'll name her Tracee after you, this way she can grow up to be a cock-sucking slob just like her mother. Second Opinion Christopher Moltisanti: I'm not fuckin' kiddin' Tony. He's a sick fuck. He was sniffin' her fuckin' panties. You know, there are worse things that can happen to a person than cancer.
Anthony is a cunt hair away from owning all of Northern Jersey. And I am that cunt hair. That's the important thing. You look better too. If you're gonna lie to me, tell me there's a broad waitin' in the car who wants to tongue my balls. Hey you want that, it's a phone call away.
You say sign, I sign. You tell me to take a crap on the deck o' the Queen Mary, an hour later, they're hosin' it down with disinfectant.
He is Risen Gigi Cestone: What's wrong with you? I'm on a roll here You'll be on a slab you keep it up. So what's this shit I hear about Tony havin' a fight with Ralph Cifaretto Did you fuck her yet? Her body is mad ripe. Yeah, but did you fuck her yet? She's creamin' fer me man. I don't know if it's even a smart thing Who could that be!!! It's the Boston Strangler At the very least, Tony owes you an apology.
The money I put in his pocket from construction alone, he should hit his knees, this prick. You think I'm afraid of that fat fuck?
I'm tellin' ya John, he's not leavin' me a lot of options here. You wanna commit suicide, pills are a lot easier. You should get the nurse to help you Amazing thing about snakes is that they reproduce spontaneously.
What do you mean? They have both male and female sex organs.Meet the Soldier V2
How can you trust a guy who can literally go fuck themselves? When the snake tempted Eve to bite the apple? Hey, snakes were fucking themselves long before Adam and Eve showed up, T.
There's Something About Mary () - There's Something About Mary () - User Reviews - IMDb
What are you doin' here? I got sent home. I got in trouble. Your son broke into his school Friday night and vandalized the swimming pool. How do you vandalize a swimming pool? They threw a bunch of stuff in it, they broke things. Why'd you do that for? On your mother's birthday?! It was after midnight. What are you, fuckin' stupid, huh?
You make this pizza? Who make-ah this pizza? Is this your store logo sir? This pie was found at a crime scene. My pizza never hurt nobody. You no find any bacteria in here! Some kids broke in a Verbum Dei High School, broke things, they left this there. Now you tell me their names, I go put-ah my foot up-ah their ass. Don't tell me you were happier when she was goin' out with that uh Jamaal Ginsburg, the hasidic homeboy. Tony, guess what we found in the bottom of the Christmas box.
Burn the fuckin' thing. This is the first Christmas in history I remember him not bein' Santa. We were talkin' the other day about that fat piece o' shit. When he got back from Boca in Christmas in '95, how he wasn't himself. What happened to uh To sell out your friends and save your own ass. That's one ride I would've loved ta been along on.
Enough o' this shit. Put up the fuckin' decorations. Well we still gotta find somebody ta play Santa. The fuck outta here. Everyone looks at Bobby, Silvio points it out to Tony What?! What are you talkin' about? You wanna play Santa Claus at the party this year? I can't do that. I don't know how. Eh, what's to know. You ask 'em what they want for Christmas, you give 'em a nice toy, and that's the end of it.
So shut the fuck up about it. I loved that cocksucker like a brother and he fucked me in the ass. One thing you gotta admit, he made a great Santa Claus. In the end, fuck Santa Claus. You were on my lap five minutes ago. Now you're goin' on Santa's list and you're gettin' nothin'! I can go get help. You're not leavin' me here. You don't trust me? Pitch dark out there. And what's your fuckin' plan?
We shoulda stopped at Roy Rogers. And I shoulda fucked Dale Evans, but I didn't! Could be him out there stalkin' us! Think about it Chrissy. Even if he's alive, he's unarmed and bleedin' like a sieve, he's in the woods, he's in his pajamas. It's the fuckin' Yukon out there. Probably thinks we left anyway.
If he's alive, which he ain't. Fuck, there's some ketchups and shit. They were in the bag. They're a little halfway frozen. Mix it with the relish. You said yourself I hit 'im in the head. Fuckin' Rasputin this guy. One time we went huntin'. Saw a sign said 'Bear Left. We were drivin' south and the sun's settin' there.
What good's that do us? At least we know what direction we're headed. Yeah but we're still fuckin' lost. You think we're diggin' a hole.